THE TESTIMONY OF THOMAS

Before I start, I think I should say something.  Ari didn’t really discuss how we recaptured Dalgherdia.  He didn’t think it was important.  But when he got there with the K’ntasari, he had to throw out Mickey’s whole plan.  He saw that the Terrans had rigged the city with evictium bombs set to trigger if the science station security was breeched.  So he had to disarm the bombs first, and then we lost our element of surprise.  The battle ended up being really hard, much harder than we anticipated.  Some of the K’ntasari were killed.  We found out what happens to them when they die away from Eden – they keep their human forms, going into a kind of stasis.

Anyway, the thing is that Ari and the K’ntasari are heroes, and maybe he doesn’t think it’s important, but the people living in Dalgherdia City sure do.

So here’s where my story begins.  I found myself weeping on the bed.  I picked myself up.  Something should be done about these sheets, I thought.

I looked in the bathroom mirror.  I’m Thomas, I thought.  Of course I am.  And this is my apartment.

The Mover heard you, Ari.  And he sent me.  It isn’t just physical trauma that initiates an emanation.  And I’m the perfect one to send because I’m the only one who wasn’t spliced.  I am Tommy, exactly the same.  Closer than Owen and Lugh, closer than Whirljack and Blackjack.

Except, well, this wasn’t exactly my style.  I went down to the bar to get a drink.  “Hey Tommy!” Eloise called.  “Long time no see!  I like your hair like that.  It’s a nice change.”

I smiled.  “I’ve been thinking about that,” I said.  “This place is pretty messed up.  How about we take the opportunity to remodel?  Maybe a whole new theme.  The Casablanca thing is getting worn out.  How about, say, a 1970s disco?”

“Geez, Tommy, I never thought I’d hear you say that.  But yeah, maybe, I think people around here want a fresh start.  I never thought we’d have a war right here in Dalgherdia.  We’d lived with those Terrans so long, took their fucking money…now what will we do without the science station?”

“Skarsia will assume control of the science station,” I said.  “We won’t lose business, don’t worry.  Maybe, if we clean the place up a bit, we can make the city more of a tourist attraction.  More reputable.  I think with the Terrans gone, more people will come here.  Plus, it’s the closest place to Eden.  The K’ntasari are going to be admitted as full citizens.  Eden is pretty boring.  I’m sure you’ll see a lot of them here.”

“The K’ntasari are amazing.  I saw some of the fighting.  Are they really bioweapons?”

“Nah.  At least, not entirely.  Davy was just fooling around.  You know how Davy is, but CenGov will never understand that.”

“Well, are you just going to stand there, or are you going to help out?  I was going to try to open tonight.  I don’t think there’s a person on Dalgherdia who couldn’t use a stiff drink.”

“Sorry, El, but I gotta go.  Since I was here already, I just thought I’d stop by.  Get me some estimates for that remodel, okay?  I’ll be in touch.”

“Must be tough, being God.”

“You don’t know the half of it.”

 

*****

 

The transformation was easy.  If the Mover approves, it’s the easiest thing in the world.  If not, it’s impossible.  And sometimes, as Ari now realized, we don’t have a choice.  If the Mover wants a change, it just happens.

And sometimes, like when we crossed the border of the Eden zone, none of us have a choice at all.

I remember the Mover’s flight, the brilliance of the soaring stars as we swept by, the coldness of the space between worlds.  It’s strange to think that we’re the only Cu’enashti who has ever experienced this.  Ashpremma is only concerned with accompanying Premma.  He doesn’t like travel, but to stay by her side he’s gone on spaceships between Dolparessa and Eirelantra.  He’s never been in space under his own power.

But it’s glorious, though, a glorious thing.  There’s something Tara needs to know.  Even before he assumed the power of Archon, Ashtara wasn’t like the other Cu’enashti.  He didn’t grow up in a forest.  He was alone, pushing his roots through rock, making space to exist where there was none.  He didn’t fall from a tree and take root by chance.  She planted him.  That’s starting to become more common now, with the family groves, but as far as we know, he was the first Cu’endhari that was intentionally planted.  Of course, people planted the common Nau’gsh – the wine orchards – and they tried to cultivate the Arya for Gyre, but it just wouldn’t work.  Tara was the first one who ever cared to plant a Cu’endhari.  Humans thought our species was worthless.

Tara says she doesn’t understand the Mover, but no one understands the Mover.  That’s the Cantor’s problem.  He’s so far beyond her, and she doesn’t know what to do.  But she has a good heart and solid roots.  The Cantor will come around.

Tara doesn’t understand the Mover, but honestly, I don’t think the Mover understands himself.  Maybe that’s why all of this happened.  When we imagine God, we assume he’ll be wise.  But in the old Gnostic myth, Sophia, the wisdom of God, was separate from him.  God needed a woman to set him straight.

Don’t underestimate your own power, Tara.

The Mover alighted on the bridge of the flagship.  The first thing that Tara said was, “It took you long enough.”  Then she saw He had become me, and she smiled.  “Thomas,” she said.  “I’m so glad you got to be born.”

I was puzzled.  I didn’t know about her dream then.  But she was happy to see me, and that was all that mattered.

“Ari’s really sorry,” I said, “but he’s afraid he’ll just screw it up more.  I got sent because I’m not a mash-up – I’m just Tommy.  Exactly the same, but different.  When Davy put us together, he wanted to keep one as common ground between the two trees, and he figured the best one to use was Tommy because the two of you were such good friends.”

“Oh Ash,” she said, embracing me, “I’m so glad.  I could always talk to Tommy.  Maybe now we can straighten this out.”

“I hate to puncture this floaty pink bubble,” said Clive Rivers, who had been observing silently from behind the information banks, “but we’re still in the middle of a war.  We just won one battle back there at Dalgherdia, but we’ve got bigger problems.  According to Cara, the CenGov fleet is preparing to move out of Tasea.  If Ashhole doesn’t get his act together, we’re cooked.”

“Do you think they’ll bother to attack Dumati?  It would slow them down, but it might make a strategic base for their troops.  Eirelantra will be in Ailann’s range by the time they get there, but if they take Dumati first, Aran would have to handle it.”

“They will, if they’re smart,” said Clive.  “The way the Cu’endhari depend on cercrotic acid – Dumati is a major source of supply.  But you could always send Naveeta there with our fleet.”

Tara disliked the idea.  “I don’t want to risk human lives if I don’t have to.”

“Um, I don’t really know anything about strategy,” I said, “but why not just abandon Dumati and let Aran make the cercrotic mulch?”

“I’ve asked Ailann before about supplying me with the cercrotic acid to make RootRiot, but he refuses.”

I must’ve looked puzzled, because she added, “It’s the Cantor’s third lesson – the Cu’enashti won’t use alchemy in a way that might mess up the economy in a major sense.  Otherwise, every tree would be hip-deep in diamonds.  Because of that, we ended up paying a lot more than money for Dumati.”

“Yeah, I know about what happened to Ross.  Everybody does.  But I think this is kinda the thing that Ari was getting at.  If Ailann hadn’t been so set on staying within the Cantor’s rules, that would’ve never happened.  Now Aran is different.  If you told him to turn Starbright Mountain into a pile of cercrotic mulch, he’d do it.”

“Pragmatic,” said Rivers.  “That solves a problem.”

“I have to think about it,” said Tara.  “The Cantor isn’t stupid.  The balance between human and Nau’gsh is delicate.  We’ve been lucky that the Novemberoon Rebellion was the only real anti-Nau’gsh reaction.  Even when Suibhne was Archon, public opinion was directed against him, not the Nau’gsh.  The last thing we need is an ugly backlash, especially now that we have to deal with integrating the K’ntasari.”

“We’ve got a common enemy, though,” Rivers said.  “That counts for a lot.”

“Well, whatever CenGov is planning,” said Tara, “stopping at Eden won’t be much of a diversion for us.  We can afford that much.”

“Why are we going to Eden?”

“The K’ntasari,” said Rivers.  “The ones who fell in battle.  Our best guess is that they’ll stay in stasis until they’re, ah, replanted.  I’ve had a bit of a chance to study them.  Edom St. John would’ve loved them.  They’re quite well engineered.  Apparently, while in the tree phase, they absorb nul-energy like a battery.  When they’ve stored enough – probably for a reasonable lifespan – they undergo metamorphosis.  But the energy can be depleted more quickly if the humanoid body has to repair injuries.  If it runs too far down, they revert to their other form.  But these were too far away from the source, so they went into, ah, energy-saver mode.  You know, it’s really beyond me how an utter moron like Davy could possibly design something far more sophisticated than the best genetic technicians in the Domha’vei.”

“From a xenobiologist’s point-of-view, that’s not the remarkable thing at all,” said Tara.  “The remarkable thing is that Davy’s creations never upset the ecosystem.  The javamelon adapts to growing anywhere – anywhere.  In a Terran transplanted biosphere, or any number of alien environments.  The thing is, that’s just impossible.  No wonder he and Cuinn won the PanGal Prize.”

“The other thing which will screw up the K’ntasari life-cycle is that energy discharge business.  It’s very much like a bee-sting.”

“It’s a lot stronger than a bee sting,” I said.  I was getting angry at the way Rivers always found a way to put us down.  And then I realized that he was jealous.  It was another thing Aran had discovered.  Rivers and Tara had a history.

And now I was jealous.  Why did she have to keep that jerk hanging around?

“That wasn’t at all what I meant,” said Rivers, with an air of frosty superiority.  “It was a metaphor.”

“I understand metaphor perfectly well,” I said.  “It’s a vital component of my art.”

“Please, spare us the singing.  I always found the other Tommy rather maudlin.  Sentimental and crude at the same time, a strange combination.  Similar to Cillian being intellectual and crude.  I suppose it’s to be expected from a creature whose leaves reach for the sunlight, but whose roots are buried in shit.”

Tara stepped between us.  “Alright, Clive, what did you mean about the bee-sting – I don’t get it either.”

“Certain varieties of bee will die after stinging.  It makes it rather a weapon of last resort.  Well, when the K’ntasari “sting,” they deplete a significant amount of their stored energy.  Sting more than a few times, and they have to recharge.  Some of the ones in stasis weren’t mortally wounded.  They just ran the battery dry.”

“That’s interesting,” said Tara.  “I wonder if they knew that would happen?  We’d probably better discuss it with Miranda.”

“Tara, you do know what this means?  CenGov is absolutely correct.  There’s no way the K’ntasari weren’t designed as a weapon.”

“Wait a minute,” I said, “trees…”

“…are so peaceful,” said Rivers, grinning.  “Surely, you can access Ari’s memories of that battle?”

I did.  Then I didn’t want to.  I saw a vivid picture of a K’ntasari male punching a hole in the chest of a CenGov soldier, then swinging his foot around in a gracefully targeted kick that snapped the neck of a woman approaching from behind.  It made me ill.

“Davy could never design anything like that.  He doesn’t have it in him,” Tara protested.

“Did you understand what I said earlier?  Davy couldn’t design a shoelace.  He’s just a puppet used by Ash, and your big, glowy boyfriend certainly has it in him.  Tara, you’re an absolute sucker for these simulacra,” he pointed at me, “and you just don’t get that they’re part of the game.  We don’t even know what game Ashhole is playing.  Maybe he provoked this war to get humanity to knock ourselves back into the Stone Age, and thus make the galaxy safe for trees.”

“You’re talking about the God of the state,” Tara dismissed.  “I should have you tried for heresy.  Anyway, there’s another reason to return to Eden…something I promised Ari.”

So she intended to eat his apple after all.  It was going to cause trouble, I was certain.  But it also made me so very happy.

“Thomas, are you able to switch between emanations?”

“Valentin managed to make the switch to Ari on Eden with no problems.  I think we’re getting the hang of things.  It would’ve been much easier if we’d had the advice of someone like the Cantor.”

“Not all Cu’enashti can transform volitionally.  It takes a substantial amount of self-control and awareness – just like most Cu’enashti can’t perform more complex alchemical transformations.  Was Ari really able to construct that ship?”

“He didn’t bother.  The Mover just transported the K’ntasari in a force bubble.  Not only was it easier, it also posed less risk of detection by the science station.”

Clive laughed.  “Of course.  He transported me like that once.  It’s so simple, I don’t know why we didn’t think of it.”

“Probably because it was so simple,” said Tara, “and also because Cillian likes toys as much as Davy.  Thomas, if it comes down to it, do you think Aran could handle a battle?”

“Aran will do what he has to.  We all will.”

“Do you trust that?” said Clive.

“I trust Ash.”

 

*****

 

Tara and I dined alone in our stateroom.  “This is good wine,” I said.  “Is it the same stuff you served Valentin?”

“Thomas, it’s a dry Skarsian Chardonnay.”

“Not even close, huh?  Valentin’s a lot better at figuring things out than I am.”

I tried to concentrate on the meal.  I knew what was coming next, and I knew what I had to do.  It wasn’t going to be easy.

Tara finished her desert, a double-helping of chocumber torte.  I was going to have to see about getting rid of those calories.  She got up and circled the table, coming around behind me and placing her hands on my shoulders.  It felt good.  Oh man, that doesn’t describe it at all.  I need a metaphor.  You know that painting that was on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel?  Where God and Adam touch fingers?  It was just like that crossed with one of those sketchy massage parlors that offer happy endings.

“Um, Tara?  I don’t know how to put this, but, let’s not have sex.”

I could feel her body stiffen with surprise.  “Are you sure you’re just derived from Tommy and not some mash-up of Tommy and maybe Evan?  Because there was never a moment in Tommy’s existence that he wasn’t thinking about sex.”

“Yeah.  I know.  But he could restrain himself.  Remember he was your friend for a couple of years before you hooked up with him, and he never said anything.”

“That’s true.  It must’ve been hard for him.”

“I don’t know for sure.  But I can kind of guess.  I’m guessing that he was a wreck.”

Tara leaned forward, resting her forehead against the back of my skull.  Her hair brushed against the skin of my neck.  I felt like I was being boiled alive.  “I can’t believe I was so dense.  All that time I was with Clive, and I never noticed that Tommy – no, that’s wrong.  Eloise tried to tell me, and I flat out denied it.  I’m trying not to make the same mistakes.  That’s why…”

“I know.  And I know that you’re afraid of what the Mover might do – that He’s not considering us part of the promise He made through Dermot, and that we’re still in a kind of judgment phase.  Believe me, we’ve thought of that.  Ari’s the only one who seriously buys the idea that Goliath is a do-over.  Ari’s kind of megalomaniacal.”

“I noticed,” Tara said ruefully.  “Nevertheless, I shouldn’t have hit him.  It’s not something lovers should do.  I’m afraid I’ve got a bit of a temper.”

“We noticed.”

“Fuck, Thomas, it isn’t something that civilized people should do.  But I’m an aristo, and you’re a Cu’enashti, and that translates into I was always allowed to do whatever I wanted, and you always let me.  Tell Ari I’m sorry, and that’ I’ll have Tarlach give me some anger management therapy – right after we crush the CenGov armada.”

I couldn’t help grinning.  “Tara, under the circumstances, it would probably be both more practical and fun to have Cillian give you a spanking.”

“Don’t make light of it, Thomas.  I was an abusive bitch.”

“Well, I mean, in your position it probably wouldn’t pay to get too civilized, would it?  We wouldn’t want you to lose your edge.”

“Speaking of losing one’s edge,” she slid into my lap.

“Tara, it’s just not a good idea.  You’ve complicated things enough.  If you fuck me, Ailann will get mad – madder than he is considering that he’ll say you cheated with Valentin and Ari now.  We don’t need Ailann to resent Goliath any more than he already does.  Plus, Ari will be mad at me, too.”

“Why would Ari be mad?  If you benefit, he benefits.”

“Ari’s not normal, Tara.  He’s kind of controlling.”

“I noticed.  Why do I always find men like that so attractive?’

“You’ve got to understand, Tara, that the Cantor’s teachings are an indoctrination in self-restraint.  And like you said about the alchemy, those teachings are probably the reason the forests weren’t burned years ago.  We’re able to fit into human culture because of her.  But Ari never had the benefit of that.  He had bits and pieces that he could use to get the K’ntasari on their feet.  But his emotions are so raw.  All he cares about is being with you, maybe even more than making you happy.  His priorities are screwed up.  It’s supposed to be your safety, our safety, your destiny, your happiness, and then finally, being with you.  He’s put being with you before your destiny and your happiness.”

“As far as I’m concerned, you can flush my destiny down a biowaste disposer.  It’s caused me no end of trouble.”

“Yeah.  It doesn’t make a lot of sense, either.  To be honest, we don’t even really know what the fuck that means.  I think the priorities would be fine if we left the destiny business out.”

Tara pulled away from me.  I was suddenly chilled, as though the shadow of a passing cloud had fallen across my leaves.  “I’ll honor your self-restraint, then,” she said.  “But if you change your mind…”

“We need to get this mess straightened out – with Atlas and Goliath and the war and everything.  Then…well, in the meantime, I’m making up a list of all the really dirty things I’d like to do.”

Onward – ->

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