As related by Prince Donovan Chase, Grand Pasha of Procurement
It’s too bad we lost the hovercar, but that’s just how it goes sometimes. Then again, with seven of us packed in there, it was pretty tight. Seven of us including Ari, who counts for at least two. So now we’ve got lots more space. That’s the upside. We have to walk. That’s the downside. I try to do as little as possible.
Nothing much exciting is happening. I’m bored. Bored is good. Bored means nobody is trying to kill you.
« Something exciting is going to happen, » says Marius. « We’ve got three adversaries waiting ahead of you, and it looks like they’ll reach your position before Ailann’s group can reach them. »
See what I mean?
« Not good, » says Ace. « The only one of us who is good at fighting is Ari, and he’s hurt. »
« I’m okay, » says Ari.
Ari doesn’t say much, despite being hooked in. Ari’s a loner. Or maybe not. I don’t always say much, but I like the company.
Geez, I miss Balin.
« I’m here, » he says.
In my head is good. In my bed is better. I think I’m gonna need to sleep soon.
« If you were in my bed, you wouldn’t be sleeping. Not after what Tara said. »
« Seriously, I’ve never been fucked before. Is it fun? »
« Constantine thinks it’s fun, » says Ace.
« It’s fun, » says Lugh.
« It depends, » says Callum.
I’m kinda surprised to hear Callum say anything at all. « What do you mean, it depends? »
« On the desire of your body and heart, but mostly on your will. Anything that you will is bearable. Whether it’s pleasurable is almost irrelevant. The point is to be able to say I chose this. Especially if you do it out of love. »
« Spoken like a true submissive, » says Ace.
I know it’s not so simple, though, because he’s kinda talking about Ross.
“His Most Puissant Sentience Lucius del Eden’d, Nuncio to the Combine of Sentients. 33rd to emanate, 99 in the color scale, resonates to 523. 1.762 meters tall, cock size 16.02 cm when erect, apparent age 26. Ambassador. Totem is Euphorbia ingens, the candelabra tree, fixed star is Sol. Esoteric symbol is the Minchiate trump, Il Sole, the sun. Dessert is green nau’gsh bubble tea. Function is facilitative empowerment, proto-conscious tendency is radiance, designated Light. Blazon is sable, three annulets, SongLuminant.”
« There’s a color named after the SongLuminants? » Ace exclaims, appalled.
« Blame Quennel and the Decorator’s Guild, » says Lucius.
So Lucius got the shrooms. Lucky dude. I would’ve done that one if I hadn’t already had an achievement. I could’ve used them.
I’m an idiot. It wouldn’t have mattered if I took some.
I’m more of an idiot. I’m hooked up. I reach into my pocket to find sparkle and numbster.
I hand the numbster to Ari. « I don’t need it, » he grumbles.
« You won’t get addicted. You’re not the type. »
« Don’t be proud, » says Patrick. « Pain management is a good thing, especially if we’re going to depend on you in a fight. »
« How’s Tielo? » asks Tommy.
I relay what BJ tells me. « He’s out of it. He goes from glassy-eyed to raving, then back again. I think the achievement he got was #65: “Blow your mind.” »
« Is he going to be all right? » asks Rand.
« Dunno. Ask Tarlach, if we ever find him. But it probably doesn’t matter. Suibhne is insane, and it never seemed to hurt much. »
« I’d ask the larches about that, » says Tommy.
« The mecha has changed direction, » says Cüinn. « It isn’t moving away from you anymore. It’s moving toward you. »
We were almost at the top of a steep incline. I could see that the guys without a hookup were pretty winded. « Let’s rest and take some sparkle, » I suggested.
It was a pretty spectacular view. It was even more spectacular when the mecha came flying in, and started blowing away the opposite hillside.
« I think it’s going after the invaders, » says Marius. « Let it be. »
« Like I’m going to get in its way, » says Ace. « That would be the shortest path to defeat. »
A stray rocket blasts the hillside beneath us. Rand motions for us to take cover.
The battle rages for a minute. From what I can see, the invaders got their hands on some pretty big guns, but the mecha’s guns are bigger. They get one good hit on it, and smoke starts to come out of its arm. Then two more arms slide out of panels recessed into the sides, each holding a plasma-automatic.
« Fourteen, » says Marius. « Thirteen. The last one is heading north, away from the mecha. »
The mecha turns and begins to fly towards us. The damaged arm continues to smoke, and it wobbles a bit in the air. Three remaining gun arms cock and point at our position.
« We don’t really have any weapons, » says Rand. « We don’t really have a plan. »
« Run, » says Ace.
« That’s a good plan, considering. »
« No, I mean run around and try to get it to deplete its energy. It was already low, and it must’ve expended a lot in that battle. »
« You still want me to do it? » sighs Wynne. « All right, I’ll get its attention. Here goes nothing. »
Wynne throws a rock. Improbably, the rock hits a tiny, glowing panel at the back of the robot. It’s glowing as an indication that it got fucked up in the fight. It’s a stabilization unit.
The mecha starts to spin uncontrollably, then smashes into the side of the cliff. It slides, flips, starts to roll down the hillside until it comes to a halt at the base of the incline. It looks like so much scrap metal; the air smells of plastic and lubrication fluid.
“Wynne Rafferty, High Lord of Probability and Master of Games. 13th to emanate, 31 in the color scale, resonates to 127. 1.733 meters tall, cock size 16.49 cm when erect, apparent age 31. Professional gambler. Totem is Pachira aquatica, the Malabar chestnut or money tree, fixed star is Sadalsuud, luck of lucks. Esoteric symbol is the geomantic glyph Fortuna major, great fortune. Dessert is cinnamon tortilla chips with dulce du leche and spicy nau’gsh salsa. Function is establishing attainment, proto-conscious tendency is strange attraction, designated Luck. Blazon is haze, on a pall argent a spinette wheel, proper.”
« Um, » says Ace. « Any engineers want to try for achievement #61, “Repair something broken?” »