The Testimony of Her Ladyship Magdelaine Lorma, Ipsissimal Mistress of the Bedchamber
Of course Tubby came to me first thing. “Apparently, Her Eminence is missing,” he said, “and His Holiness has taken a new emanation, and is lying unconscious on the beach.”
Well, I’ve taken care of Missy since she was a baby, and believe me, I’ve seen all kinds of strange things. His Holiness taking a nap wouldn’t even make the top ten. “Maybe he’s tired,” I suggested.
“Cu’enashti don’t sleep,” Tubby replied.
“Prince Chase does. When that man’s asleep, you can’t wake him for the world! Also, I saw Prince Davy sleeping once.”
“Really?” Tubby said. Oh, he was quite surprised.
“And of course there was that time when Prince Whirljack collapsed. That was when the SongLuminants took over his body.”
“That’s the sort of thing I’m worried about.”
“But the SongLuminants are our allies now.”
“Do you trust them? In the slightest?” Oh dear. Tubby was getting paranoid. The truth is that my woman’s intuition was screaming that there was something fishy going on, but I didn’t see the point in getting him all in a tizzy. The weaker sex doesn’t handle pressure very well.
“Oh, I dislike them,” I said, grabbing for another nectarine. It really wasn’t good enough. Times like this, only chocolate – the real stuff, not chocumber – and whipped cream will do. “But I dislike a lot of things. Fokkerflies. They smell disgustingly of petrol.”
“You shouldn’t comment on the personal habits of His Holiness,” Tubby chided. He’s so adorable when he’s being blindly loyal! “Next, you’ll be criticizing the mushrooms.”
“Oh the mushrooms are cute. And everything is good in its place. The mushrooms stay nicely on the roots of Atlas. The fokkerflies, on the other hand, get into the house and leave soot on the linens. It happens every time Canopus is brought over here.”
“Canopus,” Tubby muttered. “Is it on the verandah?”
I nodded. He went out to take a look. When he came back, he said, “It’s still warm, and there’s no new branch.”
“That new branch could be anywhere.” Frankly, I don’t know how Missy puts up with that. I wouldn’t want my husband spread over four galaxies. I think she likes it. She does things just to be contrary sometimes, let me tell you. She’s always been like that, since she was a girl. And so what kind of tree does she grow? It takes all kinds to make a species, I suppose.
“I’ve already contacted the Hreck on Nightside and Graysal at Shambhala. It will take six days to get an answer from the colony. We really ought to find a commhole route – it’s quite inconvenient in a crisis. The K’ntasari on Eden report that none of the unemanated branches has leafed out. If it’s the new one, in the Circinus galaxy, we’ll have no way of knowing.”
“I don’t like that either,” I said. “Although I quite liked Prince Benbow. Prince Vassali, however, well, he has a bit of an attitude problem, don’t you think?”
“I never pass judgment on such things,” Tubby said. “I simply accept and serve to the best of my ability.”
He’s so sweet, really. It’s hard to find help like that these days.
Well, we weren’t going to be able to do much of anything with His Highness asleep. I was about to suggest something to relax Tubby a little when Zosim came barging in. “We’ve got trouble,” he said.
That’s when we got the news: there was a fleet of Alliance ships emerging from a wormhole at the edge of the Domha’vei.