As Related by Hurley O’Niall, Lord of the Gates
Suibhne is on the floor, playing soldiers. Davy and Manasseh are with him, but Davy is sulking, and Manasseh looks ready to cry. Manasseh can’t understand why Davy is mad, can’t understand why Stephen won’t come home, after all the years he spent waiting for Stephen.
Manasseh doesn’t mind about Barnabas, but he doesn’t understand why Stephen would do something so hurtful to Ethan. Suibhne is playing with his tanks, ignoring the drama.
« Hey, Hurley, » he says. « Do me a favor and hold this for a minute? » Absently I take the tank from his hands.
“Hurley O’Niall, Lord of the Gates. 24th to emanate, 52 in the color scale, resonates to 239. 1.680 meters tall, cock size 15.93 cm when erect, apparent age 23. Psychic. Totem is Adansonia grandidieri, Grandidier’s baobab, fixed star is Gienah, wing. Esoteric symbol is the Etruscan letter 
. Dessert is the nau’gsh novelty ice cream cart. Function is creative inspiration, proto-conscious tendency is reverie, designated Dream. Blazon is argent, on a rustre aquamarine, a key bearing an Archonate cross, proper.”
« Gotcha, » says Suibhne, pointing at me triumphantly.
« #55: “Do a favor for a madman,” » Wynne proclaims.
« Fuck you! » I scream, running from the room.
*****
I’m not one to get angry. Suibhne probably didn’t deserve it, either. He may have thought he was doing me a favor.
No, he didn’t. Yes, he did. He knew damn well what he was doing. He’s only mad north-north-west. When the wind is southerly, he knows a penguin from a fokkerfly.
He knew that I was deliberately trying to avoid the achievements so that Driscoll wouldn’t be alone. And he thought he was doing me a favor because Driscoll is being a prick, stubbornly avoiding the achievements for reasons of his own, and I’m so lonely and depressed.
It’s not an unfamiliar feeling. As Driscoll’s lover, I’m often lonely and depressed.
There’s a knock at my door. It’s Daniel. Of course, I invite him in. Besides respecting that he’s the oldest of us all, who can refuse Daniel anything?
« I thought I might ask your opinion on some things because you have such a good imagination. I already asked Malachi and…wow! »
As he steps into my apartment, he’s transfixed by the kaleidoscopic patterns of light on the wall. There are no windows in here, but you’d never realize it. It has the constant illusion of expanding out into light.
The room is mostly empty. I don’t see a need for furniture. Out of the corner of my eye sometimes I might catch a material object sneaking into the room. Mostly, though, the room is a mood, the mood of a dream. It’s thicker and warmer than thought. I’d say like honey, but not all dreams are sweet.
« I, um, wanted you to help me decorate my room, » Daniel says. « I know the guys have been complaining forever. Back in the day, I only even put up curtains that time when Tara came to visit me. She was the only thing that mattered to me, and now we’re stuck with it. »
« And what matters to you now? »
« Tara. »
After a minute, he says, « maybe Malachi. And everyone else, except…»
Except that we were lied to, led to believe that we were a single being developing multiple personae when it was the other way around. The lie was specifically for the purpose of maintaining n’aashet n’aaverti, so that we would have no priority greater than Tara.
Unified purpose could only go so far. We had to turn to each other before everything fell apart.
« We’re missing something, » I say to Daniel. « We’re missing the dreaming trees. »
« No one has ever seen Ophion, » says Daniel. « And the Ophion branches have never been to their home. »
This is about more than redecoration.
« What is the point of this stupid quest? » Daniel asks.
« The point of any quest – to get us to start asking the right questions. »
« If I and I is really just us, why can’t we just know? » he says despairingly.
« You tell me. You’re the oldest. »
« If I had Davy and Dermot to help me, maybe I could. But Davy could never put it into words. »
I understand this. Sometimes the most straightforward logical way of thinking isn’t the most efficient. Most of the time. Humans developed science because they are arrogant and insist on being right. I and I is more practical. He is happy to get something accomplished and allow the humans to explain how he did it a thousand years later.
The intuition of dreams allows the mind to sort and discard thousands of dead ends that a methodical exploration would waste time testing.
I put my hand on Daniel’s forehead. He’s laughing as Tara lets go of a balloon. He shouldn’t be laughing because Tara is practicing letting go. She has to practice because she’s no good at it. I and I is even worse.
Sometimes you have to let go, like falling backwards into feathers.
And then I can’t stop laughing, because the only stories I can remember of trust falls are when they didn’t work out. For some reason, my friends weren’t paying attention, and I fell flop onto the ground. I was traumatized for life.
This girl I knew cracked her head, and they had to send her to the hospital. Our teacher got suspended.
It’s so sad it’s hilarious.
Daniel is giggling too, cramming his fingers into his mouth because he knows the pain of others isn’t funny. He laughs until tears run out of his eyes and he says, « This universe, Hurley. Did we really make the right choice? »
« Tara was here. »
« That’s not what I mean. I mean the priorities. We could take her and go somewhere else. Benbow said that maybe we could go somewhere else. »
« He did. That’s what he’s for. »
« He rescued the Earth from the Alliance fleet. »
« That’s just something he did. That isn’t his purpose. I and I brought him here to dream another solution, to see if it’s feasible and preferable. That’s how I and I does things – like he made Goliath. He takes risks. That’s why Stephen is first in the color scale, and now everyone synchronizes based on him. Benbow is another risk. »
« I and I would risk losing Tara? »
« He doesn’t see that as a risk. He doesn’t believe it possible. No, possible isn’t the word. He literally can’t conceive of it because without Tara, He couldn’t exist. »
« But Benbow doesn’t love Tara. Is that part of his purpose? To see if that’s feasible and preferable? »
A mote is forming in the corner of my eye. It looks like a pottery wheel.
« Daniel, let’s make pots. You can use some to decorate your apartment. »
Daniel’s pots are portly and symmetrical. I can imagine them full of cheerful blossoms. Every time I try, I seem to be making some kind of figurine. A man with a flower for a face. A moth with a man’s head. It occurs to me that if I used faience, they’d be exactly the right color.
« Why can’t Driscoll love me? » I murmur.
« We’re drifting, » says Daniel.
I nod. « That happens here. The interior of this room is dream. I only come here when I can’t think my way out of a problem. »
« I’m going to paint stars on my pottery, » says Daniel. « Stars for Tara and swirls for us. »
And he does. It’s really amazing how the light shines from under the crackling.
Now I’m falling back into cotton. Then I realize that I’m making a quilt. The quilt is sewn in a ten-petalled lotus design.
« Sloane was quoting Tennyson’s “Lotus-eaters” as if it was a bad thing. He must’ve forgotten that we’re trees. He must’ve forgotten that we’re immortal. »
« Sloane is fine, » says Daniel. « Sloane got laid. When my apartment is finished, why don’t we get together? I won’t make you forget about Driscoll, but I will make you happy. »
« Is that why you came here? »
« Maybe. My bed is empty. »
This is hard to imagine. Everyone is always piled on Daniel’s bed.
« Quennel is gone, Sloane is gone, and Evan didn’t want to be by himself, so he went over to Beat’s room to jam. Whirljack and BJ are there, too. It’s funny that they never thought of playing together before. »
« What about Malachi? »
« We have to stop forgetting that there’s no need to be jealous, » Daniel insists, irritated.
« I’m only human. And a tree. And a mothman. »
« It’s not like Malachi could lose me. Where would I go? » He sighs, and then says, « Let’s paint inspirational sayings on stones. We could leave them in a bowl, and when people came to visit, they could draw one at random. It would be fun! »
Daniel paints, « “More love is better.” »
I paint « “Curry.” »
Daniel paints « “You know it’s time.” »
I paint « “Spike.” »
« We should get other people to add theirs, » says Daniel. Then he grabs something else that seems to be floating in the room, an unmarked box. I have never had so many things in my apartment. It’s getting cluttered.
Daniel opens the box. « Mason jars! » he cries, excited. « And the ancient glass ones, too, not synth ones. We can wrap them in fabric and then fuse objects to them –feathers and buttons and bits of string. »
I glue a key onto mine. « What’s that? » Daniel asks.
« An ancient security device. It opened locked doors. »
« How? Is there a laser hidden inside that drills through the lock? Or is it some kind of sonic emitter that disturbs the security program? »
« If we were outside, you’d smell that it’s only steel. It’s a purely mechanical device. Strangely, it has become an archetypal symbol of release, but was equally used for the purpose of exclusion. »
I painted a key on Constantine, and now it’s on my coat-of-arms. I don’t want to bring attention to this, so I say instead, « What do you want to do with all the leftover jar lids? »
« Spray paint them in colorful hues to turn them into coasters. »
« Now that’s wise. People are always leaving their drinks sitting on the furniture. »
« Owen is the worst. Owen and Marius. »
« I thought you would say Barnabas. »
« No, Barnabas is okay. He watches out for things. Ethan and Barnabas aren’t like Owen and Lugh at all. »
« Daniel, why did you come here today? »
He grabs me by the wrist. « Let’s take this stuff downstairs, » he says.
He throws the quilt over the enormous recliner, the one that used to belong to Ailann, but is now occupied by Mickey and Lucius. He puts my faience statues and a flower filled pot on a shelf which has remained empty of decoration for over five decades.
« I made these candles with Malachi, » he says, « because Malachi is good at bringing light. »
They are thick cylinders of multicolored wax, and fit perfectly when he jams them into the fabric-covered jars. He picks up Owen’s drink and slides a coaster underneath it.
« The pièce de résistance, » says Daniel, placing the bowl of stones on the bar. « Ta daa! »
“Daniel McDarragh, Ard-rí an chroí. 1st to emanate, 77 in the color scale, resonates to 389. 1.822 meters tall, cock size 16.51 cm when erect, apparent age 19. Migrant agricultural worker. Totem is Prunus persica, the common peach, fixed star is Alnilam, arrangement of pearls. Esoteric symbol is the Minchiate trump La Speranza, hope. Dessert is chocumber-nau’gsh cupcake. Function is creative inertia, proto-conscious tendency is flowering, designated Sex. Blazon is coral, on a bend argent, a Cu’enashti nau’gsh rose, proper.”
« All right everybody, listen up, » says Daniel. « I don’t ask for much, but eleven of our brothers are still stranded. This situation is intolerable. And just think that every time we grow a new branch, he’ll have to complete a quest achievement. Now I know Tarlach has been doing a great job with the welcoming committee, but I need every one of us to take responsibility to make certain that all branches share the love. Hurley is going to tell us how to do that. »
I am?
« We should use the café, » I blurt out. « Take someone you love out for dessert. Better still, take someone you don’t know very well out for dessert. »
Malachi is waiting on Daniel’s bed. Malachi hands Daniel a painted stone. Daniel places it in the bowl on the bar. The stone reads, « “Go for it.” »
Daniel joins Malachi on the bed. « Good choice, » says Malachi. They look at me expectantly.
On the floor, Suibhne giggles. « Gotcha, » he says.
Further Curious Tales of the Chevalier’s Arbor: Sharing a Beer with Friends