As related by His Most Sublime and Eminent Radiance, Ailann Tiarnan, Archon of Skarsia
We didn’t kill the telepaths after all, and that means they can continue to attack us. The dull, cold ache in my chest has changed to an acid churning. I’m staring at Tara, who is staring out the window of the train. I wish I could say something to bolster her, but I can’t, not yet. I haven’t had a drink since the battle, though.
Ellery is sitting next to Callum. I get the distinct impression, however, that it’s Ellery protecting Callum, not the other way around. I also get the distinct impression that he’s avoiding me. Not because he lacks sympathy – just the opposite. It’s because he knows I feel like I’ve failed him, knows it’s easier for me not to face him.
Knows it will be much easier for me to take support from the one I did not fail.
Behind me, I can feel Harsh’s eyes on the back of my neck. Beat nudges him gently. Then I understand that’s also what Ellery wanted me to see – there’s no jealousy between them, only love. Which is why it’s all right, but also why, if I’m going to walk this path, I have to let go of my jealousy.
But Cillian.
Cillian was never jealous. Cillian wouldn’t want me to be alone.
A decision is made, and Harsh slips out of the seat next to Beat and into the seat next to mine. He doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t have to. If I close my eyes, I can feel the heat of his body, the shallowness of his breathing, the fluttering of his heart. I can smell the desire on him – and the fear.
« Ailann, » he says quietly, « Ailann, I…»
And then the train conductor makes an announcement: “Harsh del Shambhah’d, Sublime Commander, Most Antient and Loyal Order of the Corset. 47th to emanate, 55 in the color scale, resonates to 257. 1.78 meters tall, cock size 17.69 cm when erect, apparent age 27. Gigolo. Totem is Liquidambar orientalis, the Turkish sweetgum, fixed star is Chara, joy. Esoteric symbol is the Etruscan letter 
. Dessert is Skarsian Delight. Function is exegetic empowerment, proto-conscious tendency is delight, designated Ecstasy. Blazon is lemon crème, a fascinus murrey within a double tressure murrey.”
« That was probably #31: “Become romantically involved with someone new,” » says Cüinn.
Harsh leans back in his seat, staring at the ceiling.
I place my hand gently on his forearm. He’s shaking. He comes off so confident, slick, a player, but really, he’s vulnerable, much like…like Cillian.
« Harsh, what is it that you want? Not from me, necessarily, but from life in general. »
« I want to have a lot of lovers, and to give them pleasure and happiness, » he says unhesitatingly. « Not exactly like Constantine although I admire him deeply. He’s more into loyalty and service; my thing is love and desire. »
He looks me in the eye. « Beat’s been very good to me. »
« And Cüinn. »
Harsh breaks into a grin. « I think geekbois are hot. Do you mind? »
Cüinn is turning scarlet. Well, let Harsh have his revenge. « No, I don’t mind. In fact, I see the point. Cüinn’s performance is always quite demonstrative. »
Now everyone is staring at Cüinn and grinning.
« Look at it this way, » Lorcan says to Cüinn. « You’ve been spared weeks of Tarlach’s PRAT/PIT therapy. Also, you can come hang out with us any time. »
For a moment, everything almost feels normal. Then I remember Cillian is not with me, Cillian, my companion from the very beginning, even from before we knew what it meant to exist. My happiness sours into guilt.
« Cillian isn’t gone, » Tara says. « We just have to find him. »