As related by Prince Ellery Alderman, Ipsissimal Sugarboi, and Lens del N’stl’d, Most Astute High Herzog of Nightside
I need help. I don’t feel safe.
Stupid, stupid, stupid. None of us feels safe. It’s just that with Cillian gone, Ailann is broken and Callum is broken. There’s no one left to protect the Heart of Ashtara.
Then I hear the voice: “Lens del N’stl’d, Most Astute High Herzog of Nightside. 40th to emanate, 19 in the color scale, resonates to 67. 1.695 meters tall, cock size 15.44 cm when erect, apparent age 38. Surveyor. Totem is Yucca brevifolia, the Joshua tree, fixed star is Ain, the eye of the bull. Esoteric symbol is the geomantic glyph Via, the way. Dessert is schneeballen dusted with nau’gsh powder. Function is visionary insight, proto-conscious tendency is focus, designated Lens. Blazon is cerulean, above a fess engrailed argent, spectacles argent.”
Ross says, « Lens? Are you with us? I’m here. I can feel you in my branch. »
Lens is weeping.
« What is it, Lens? » Balin asks. But Lens can’t pull himself together enough to explain. I’m not sure I want to, but I reach into his branch.
*****
I feel foolish. And frightened. And foolish because I’m frightened. I’ve been sent upon this silly errand because it’s simple. Only a fool would be afraid of a haunted house. And I can’t see very well right now anyway.
Maybe that makes it worse?
A holographic image of a bloodied skeleton drops into the path in front of me. I’m startled more than scared. If my senses were normal, I wouldn’t have reacted at all. I would have known, from the lack of scent, that it was pure illusion.
It reminds me of the funny story about how Chase couldn’t operate the holographic spaceflight simulator because he couldn’t reconcile what his eyes told him was there with what his senses told him was not. And then Suzanna refused to let him near the controls of her spaceship until one day, during an emergency, Chase had to take over, and without looking at any of the sensors, navigated an asteroid field.
I wish I could feel that memory in Chase’s branch. I wish I could feel Chase; his lazy warmth giving me courage not to react to the spiders hanging from the ceiling.
There are blood-curdling screams, which I must remind myself are faked. I’m forced through a small doorway designed to induce claustrophobia. But I know it’s nothing like real claustrophobia, like what Ailann experienced in that nul-chamber.
I’m okay.
I’m okay.
A ghost steps into my path. Or rather, a woman wearing a sheet. She pulls off her hood. It’s Heavensent.
Mein Gott. Mein Gott. Haunted houses aren’t supposed to have real dead people in them.
« Did you think you could forget about me? » she says.
Her body bursts into flames. She screams. I can smell the flesh burning, flesh and wood. I want to run, but the door has closed behind me, and the burning apparition blocks my path.
The flames die down. Another woman stands before me: Hellborne. Her robes are charred, her face blackened with soot. « And this is the real horror, » she says. « All I know is hatred. »
Suddenly, she has a spear in her hands, and she’s charging at me. She’s faster, and the tip grazes my arm as I dodge out of her way. I have to get past her, but she won’t let me by. She thrusts the spear at my face, and now the tip is molten hot.
I’m terrified that she’ll burn me, but then her face starts to melt. I can see Heavensent’s mutilated features beneath. « I will never be free of this nightmare, » she says.
I make a break for it. I’m past her and almost at the exit when she says, « If Cillian still exists, what do you think he’ll become? »
*****
« That’s disturbing, » says Balin. « That’s incredibly disturbing. Lens needs support. »
But I can’t. I shouldn’t have looked. I can’t stop shaking. I can’t.
I need Ailann, but Ailann is most definitely not paying attention.
« Ellery, take a deep breath, » says Ross. « We need you to go to Lens. Just tell him to reach out to one of us – Balin or Ari. »
I can’t move. I’m frozen in place.
« It’s okay, » says Lens. « I’m with Mickey and Valentin and Lucius. I’ll be okay. Ellery, Aran is coming over. Aran says he’s Ailann’s brother, and he’ll protect you in his stead. »
Aran. Aran is terrifying.
« Give him a chance, » says Ross. « He wants to help. »
It’s the one thing Ross can’t stand – ostracism. Aran is ostracized, not obviously, not maliciously, but simply because he scares just about everyone. If Ailann is a compassionate god, Aran is a god who punishes.
« He’s good to have on your side, » says Balin.
« He judges. He’ll judge me. If the heart of Ashtara is judged before it is time, it won’t balance the feather, and will be devoured. »
« Dude, » says Chase, « I don’t have a clue what you just said there. »
Someone is coming. It’s Cüinn. Cüinn frightens me because he’s so erratic and brilliant, but there’s absolutely no malice in him. I think as long as there’s no possibility of pollination, I can deal with Cüinn.
« Wow, that was pretty freaky, » says Cüinn. « If we had any idea, we’d never have sent Lens in there alone. But he can see now. At least he can see something, but he doesn’t really understand it. Maybe you can help. Do you want a glass of water? How about a chocumber ice? Chocumber is always good at a time like this. »
« Water is fine. »
I let him put his arm around me, guiding me back to the others. And it frightens me, but it’s warm, too. It’s a different kind of fear.
« I’m still here, » says Ross. « The others are trying to make sense out of Lens’ vision. »
« Is it…»
« It’s not disturbing, » says Ross. « It’s only confusing. I think you could look at it and be all right. »
Cüinn gets a chair for me, waits for me to sit, and places the water in front of me. He sits across the table from me. He’s concerned. His eyes are kind. He’s wearing those silly, thick-rimmed glasses which do nothing, not like Lens’ spectacles or Cillian’s shadehuds. Cüinn thinks that glasses make him look more intellectual.
« All right, » I murmur, taking a few deep breaths. I hold onto Cüinn’s hand.
There’s a black cloud hanging over us, a cloud which keeps getting smaller. But beyond it is light, and the light is far more fearsome. Waves of light charge into each other, like a duel of opposing oceans. The waves throw spray of particles, photons, bubbles.
« SongLuminants? The SongLuminants are…fighting? »
« I think you’re right, » says Balin. « The groups glow differently. But it looks like there are three different groups, and the group behind the cloud isn’t one of the groups that is fighting. »
It’s hard for Lens to see because there are so many layers of deception. It’s wrong, so very wrong. I hurt. The heart of Ashtara hurts. « Tara’s Destiny is the first priority, but to get there, we have other priorities as well, and the SongLuminants will stand in our way. They don’t want to see other sentient species reach their full potential. They want to keep control. »
« They’re evil, » says Aran. His statement is so sharp, so abrupt that I jump out of Lens’ branch, and nearly out of my seat. It’s only then that I realize Lens has been trying to explain our conclusions to the others, the ones who are still locked out of the grove. The ones who are still alone.
Aran has judged, and his judgment is not against the truth of the heart of Ashtara. I’m the one whose judgment has lacked righteousness. « I’m so sorry, » I say, throwing myself into his bewildered arms.